7 Tips For Christian Singles Dating
One of the toughest challenges facing Christians today is finding the right partner. It is not really as difficult as some of the Christian singles have come to believe. Many Christian relationships have ended in successful marriages. It is also important to note that some Christians become so desperate looking for their better halves that they make regrettable mistakes. The guilt that comes with these kinds of errors when dating usually leaves both people involved in the relationship hurt and dejected. Are you worried about the right time, right way or the right person to date? I am going to teach you about seven ways in which you can handle dating as a Christian single.
Have Christian friends for support and guidance
The phrase “no man is an island” simply means we cannot cope with the complexities of life by ourselves. As human beings it is our nature to err but we can always avoid some obvious problems. You probably have friends at church who are always ready to help you. I don’t mean that you should seek their approval on everything going on in your life. They will always be ready to share their experiences as well as tell you what to expect when dating. They will offer valuable advice on how you can handle a date and still keep the moral values expected of you by God.
Purpose in dating
A research revealed that 90% of the people could not give a definite answer when they were asked what theu really want in life. What is your purpose when you plan on dating that handsome guy or that gorgeous lady? It may be marriage, companionship, pressure from friends, or the urge to have kids. It is prudent that you have a good reason as to why you have decided to date. For Christian Singles the main reason people date is to get life-companions. When both of you are driven by this purpose it is easier to have meaningful relationships which end in marriage.
Set and maintain your standards
The main reason why single Christians do not easily get into relationships is the high standards that they have set for themselves. This is actually good for them. The Bible says our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit so they should always be treated in such a way that acknowledges the presence of the Holy Spirit. You don’t have to stoop to the level of someone you are dating or intend to date. If this person causes you to go against your principles it is better to bow out and seek another person. You don’t have to compromise in order to save a relationship which may not even work. There’s plenty of time for you to stick around and get another date. Never stop shutting the door to people who are incompatible to you because eventually you will meet that special person.
Get a mentor( married man or woman)
One of the ways of achieving a dream is by having a mentor. A certain young man was seeking to have a successful relationship leading to marriage and did not know how to go about it and at the same time be a good Christian. Luckily for him, he sought help from an elderly man (a fifty year old married friend who also a member of the church he attended). He hung out with him often asking all sorts of question regarding relationships. He used the valuable advice he got to start his own relationship and after ten months he tied the knot. This shows the importance of having mentor for single Christians. Mentors are usually experienced, having seen it all. They will tell you what to do and what to avoid when dating.
Seek love, not lust
This era is dominated by so many lies which unfortunately, Christians also believe. Many people believe that dating is one way to ensure that one is never sexually starved. Christians are not an exception. It is not mandatory for people in a relationship to be intimate. According to the Christian teachings, couples are only meant to get intimate after they have tied the knot. You may be a single Christian who intends to overcome the sexual desire by dating. Dating is not about sex. It is about love. If you find that your relationship is driven by lust then it is time you changed it or bowed out.
Do not be over-cautious
Looking at the biographies of hundreds of successful entrepreneurs, one thing is common; their ability to venture in uncharted territories. They had business ideas that common people did not think of, or gave little attention. Christians live according to the scriptures. When you strictly follow what the scriptures say, you will find it difficult to date. You need to go out there and date someone. It does not means that you will eventually go down the aisle with the person you are dating. Get to know each other more. Dating is not a waste of time. You may discover that the person you are dating is not just the right person. This is way better than just being in the comfort zone, fearing that you will meet someone and then break up. Go out there and date different people.
Guard your purity
People date and get married. People date and break up. These are the two outcomes of any relationship between a man and a woman. Whatever the outcome, one thing you must do is guard your purity as a lioness protects her cubs. Situations that lead to intimacy are well known. When dating, hangout in parks, restaurants or any other public place. It is also advisable to hang out with friends. Use this time to know each other better. The moment you go to private places where it is only the two of you there are many chances of engaging in sexually activity. Sex is a gift from God and only married couples are allowed to engage in it.
All these tips points to the fact that marriage in Christianity is to be respected. I have identified the challenges most single Christians face when in relationships. A story is told of a woman who went to the woods praying to God for a good man to marry her. She prayed till darkness set in and suddenly an owl nearby hooted “Whooo!” The woman, thinking it was God, said “Just any man!” The moral of this short story for single Christians is that they should look for the right person for the relationship. This is because the main reason a Christian dates is to find someone to marry. Do not just settle for anyone for the reason that they go to the same church or are also Christians. You are looking for a companion that you are going to spend the rest of your life with. Look at the character and not the outward appearance only. The person you are dating should be compatible to you in all ways, and love should be the binding factor. It guarantees you a faithful companion who will take you through the eventful journey of life.