If there is one thing that we can all agree on it is the fact that singles don’t have it easy. Indeed being single is not easy and it only gets harder when we factor in different cultures and social influences that affect our day to day lives.
Among all singles out there Christian singles have it especially hard mostly because of how these individuals are viewed by the people that they go to church with and interact with on a day to day basis.
There is a lot of peer pressure being put on them and there is a lot of social tension floating in the air around them which often times leads to a strong feeling of awkwardness and anxiety, which is enough to make even the thickest skinned people feel uncomfortable.
However, these effects differ between genders and even though we don’t really like to think of this aspect too much, each side of the Christian singles fence is dealing with different issues because of their relationship status.
One of the strongest obligations that the bible conveys towards the Christian man is the obligation to find a suitable wife and start a family.
This very idea is transmitted from a very early age through all the social interactions that the Christian child and Christian man have constantly, and even though it might be too subtle at times, it is still felt by the receiver.
With that in mind, when dealing with male Christian singles it is to be expected that they get a lot of pressure put on them while they are single in order to “find a girl” by nearly everyone that they come into contact.
This kind of pressure, combined with seeing their friends and family in solid steady relationships, makes the singles in question fall into a state of depression and often times even question their very manhood.
The social backlash is also a factor that plays out in the long run and often times find themselves excluded from certain community activities, being looked down upon, and even being gossiped about on a regular basis.
When it comes to Christian singles, women have it a lot harder and tougher than men.
According to Christian culture, while the man is urged to go out there and find someone to be in a relationship with or marry, the woman is supposed to make herself more appealing and inviting in order to attract the desired man towards her.
That being said if a Christian woman is single for a rather long time the community itself considers this to be directly her fault and the amount of pressure being put on her shoulders is rather obscenely big to the point where it is downright unfair.
Gossiping, indirect social humiliation, pity, these are all too familiar to Christian women that have been single for a while now.
Something that needs to be understood right off the bat is the fact that being single is not a problem; it’s not a disease nor is it a punishment.
Being single can be a decision or the result of a series of events that led up to these relationship statuses which in turn can either be a blessing or a curse, depending how you look at it.
The actual problem with Christian singles is how the community sees them and reacts to their decisions or relationship status.
These reactions can be, and often are, too exaggerated and uncalled for, and no matter how thick your skin is, no matter how much you can take, you will be affected by them and you might have to face varying degrees of pressure and depression.
The two biggest mistakes that Christian singles often make is they either fight back or run away from these issues.
One thing that we have to understand about the Christian communities is the fact that they are very tight-knit, often times being involved in each other’s lives from their very birth to their very deaths. They grow up together, they help one another, they go to church together every Sunday and on every Christian holiday, they all know one another and often times they want to help each other out.
Ok, it is annoying and downright disheartening to find yourself being the center of gossiping attention and the primordial answer that find is to either fight back or run away.
Indeed, the fight or flight instinct is what drives Christian singles to some desperate measures, however, it does not have to be like this.
The best thing that Christian singles can do is to reach out to the community and ask for help.
Maybe there is something wrong somewhere and people that are looking at things from the outside can often give provide a different view on the situation which might help you figure out and fix some flaws that you might have been oblivious to.
Ask them to set you up with someone or for help finding other Christian singles that you might get along with.
Often times this works out and the effort is shifted from gossiping towards helping a fellow Christian out.
Being Christian singles does not make you any better, any special or any different from all the other singles out there.
You are simply more devoted and more in touch with your religion and spirituality so don’t look at this as being a label or a restriction.
That being said, there are other alternatives out there for you to meet your significant other or at least potential significant other.
The internet, for example, has a very large selection of dating websites that you can use in order to find other singles to mingle with and get to know.
Not to mention the fact that it offers a very wide variety of tutorials, instructions, tips, tricks, advice and a slew of things that will help you get into the dating world with the right foot forward.
All you Christian singles out there, it is time to leave the bachelor lifestyle behind you and find that special someone that will make your life a living party for as long as you will live.
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